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Jan 15

Written by: Rodney Joyce
15/01/2007

This is a heads up - mark the 4th of August in your diaries...

It's a sad day indeed in London with Rod announcing his retirement from the Continent of Europe. It's been 8 years since our bold, young (good-looking), modest hero set foot on these shores with nothing in his pocket but a little over £3000 (a mere-pittance by today's standards and James average credit card bill after a "quiet" night out). This was his life's savings after selling everything he owned in Sith Afrika before embarking on the epic voyage with his trusty steed I mean pal, Glenn.

In case you did not know, I applied for my Australian Residency Visa in June, 2005. £2000 and 1.5 years later the Aussie government decided that I would not attempt mass genocide or wanton acts of terrorism (some of the things you have to check (or not check as the case was) on your application form.

In the last 8 years I have made many good friends in the UK and have seen many good mates get married (and some divorced unfortunately) and said "laters" (never say goodbye) to others who did not hold the right piece of paper to be allowed to stay in the UK (despite paying taxes and being hard workers!). I don't go home with nothing; I purchase a little cottage/ex-council flat in one of the most up and coming areas of London (Canada Water, some (usually me) say "the next Kensington") and have experienced a lot of the good things London has to offer (with the exception of the Circle Line Booze Cruise which I still plan to do in the next few months). And now it is time to say goodbye.

Some idiot once said "The man who is tired of London is tired of life". I think it was Red Ken (shut it, Glenn ;) but anyway, I am not tired of London, I just wanna see some more of the what the world has to offer, and mainly I want to live near a beach. So it is with much sadness that I am saying goodbye to London and all you good people... I have not yet decided on how to mark this momentous occasion but it is my 30th Birthday in September and I do not want to celebrate it alone in Aus, so I thought "why not combine the two?". I HAVE to be in Sydney (yes, sorry Melbourne/Brissy and Perth folks, Sydney captured my heart like some young Spanish tart at the Walkabout who never replied to my first SMS but then to the second and then not again, just to prove that women are pure evil and to confuse this young man) by the 12 of August or my visa is voided. It is a little sooner than I wanted, but I am starting to get quite excited now, and I know how busy people can be, so I wanted to start ingraining this date in peoples subconscious so that at least 5 people rock up at my farwell party!

All of the peeps I know in Aus in Sydney - prune the hedges and hide your daughters - Rod's coming to town! All the peeps who crashed (and in some cases puked - you know who you are) on my sofa over the last 8 years, it's time to cash in those favours! To all the other peeps I know in Aus not in Sydney - hope to see you soon for a Bundy ;) Seriously - I would be lying if I said I was not a little anxious about starting a new chapter in the Book of Rod so if you can give me advice or tips I would be most grateful. I have moved a LOT in my life (by the time I was 11 I had moved 12 times or something and lived in 4 different countries - the Joyce's are nomads) but this could be my final move depending on how much I like Aus.

I've made a public event here, but for those loosers who are not dumbTV members and know me, please tell them about the 4th...

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